Women who choose NOT to take control of their men..

My husband is this gorgeous, big tough jock who works out, plays competitive sports (still at 45), is intelligent (has a couple of master's degrees & is working on a Ph.D), and I have him totally wrapped around my little finger. He wasn't into ANY of the kinky stuff I'm into when we first met, in fact he was very much just your normal wham bam thank you ma'am fucker - good, regular, vanilla kinda sex.

He worshiped me, and he'd pretty much do whatever to make me happy, (except kinky sex stuff).

When I became a "professional dominatrix" about 2 years into our relationship, he had seen it coming. I'd always been bossy & would throw "temper tantrums" (like a stupid 3 year old), when I didn't get my own way. One particular time I threw a plate at his head to emphasize my point of view. I was only 21 - I had no idea that what I really wanted was a dom/sub relationship - I didn't know a thing about power exchange back then, but I knew I was different than the average girl. I dug around, and found The Black Rose, and would make him come to their weekly meetings with me, still he refused to bend to my way of thinking. I didn't really care though as I had these other men throwing themselves at my feet, and begging me for a "session"...

Next thing he knows I'm working full time at a dungeon, and exploring all of my kinky fantasies with other men.

My husband didn't like it, but he had no option. It was not a negotiable part of our relationship. He quickly grew to realise that when I want something, "no" is not part of the equation. He wanted me & for me, I was pretty much turned on by the fact that this guy might be harder to conquer than any one else I'd been with.

Every single day I'd get off multiple times with subs, and then I'd come home, and get fucked royally by my husband. It was the best of both worlds. Several years went by and I kind of pulled back from the professional domination, mostly due to the fact that I had a nice stable of men that I would call up and order to come visit when I was in the mood.

However, as with most things, I got bored with that stable of slaves. During this whole time, I'd be "training" (on the down low) my husband. For instance, he's a total leg man, and I LOVE getting my legs licked and massaged. However, he was only into me rubbing my legs all over him, or watching me in high heels, so before I'd allow him any of that, I'd make him suck on my toes, and run his tongue up the back of my leg. Then I'd take my feet and rub them over his cock, but would refuse to give him a blow job... so he got to like the feet thing, although was definitely never a "foot fetishist".

I'd force him onto his back and climb onto him, and even though he'd only like to do the oral thing when I was laying flat on my back with my legs spread, he grew to LOVE it when I'd climb up onto his face, and ride it, - but he'd never been into "smothering" or "facesitting" previously. He never realised that I was imposing my will upon him, or that he was being a tad submissive & kinky with me.

From there it was time to step it up a bit, I love strap on play, and one night when he came to bed, I was dressed in my leather (which he does like) but when he pulled back the covers, he discovered I was wearing a big black strap on. Now being that he's my husband, it was NOT my plan to fuck him up the ass right then and there... I was going to get him to the point where it would be something he might start thinking about while at work, and then perhaps he might find that I'd left a window on the computer up on a strap on lover's website, and he'd think about it some more. (Clever, aren't I)?

So that first night with the strap on, I told him about how I'd fucked my girlfriend wearing it earlier, and told him that if he licked my cock, he'd taste her pussy juices on it... so of course he was going to try it... Do you see how this worked?

Next thing he knew, I was climbing between his legs (while he's on his back with his legs spread open), and while wearing my hottest leather outfit, and a nice big strap on. I'd "pretend" to fuck him like a girl. Surprisingly enough (Duh...) he liked it. Or at least that big hard cock of his did. I'm not saying this happened over night, because it didn't, but now, 15 years later, he's as kinky as I want him to be.

There are definitely some no-no's in our relationship, BUT, I'd bet that within another few years he'll be 100% exactly into what *I* want. For instance, I love the cuckold thing, and fantasize about being at a swingers party, and choosing a guy to fuck, and all the while making my husband watch & jerk off. After I've gotten done with the guy I've just allowed to fuck me, I'd want my husband to eat me out, yeah and that includes the other guys cum too...

I'm also way into the humiliation thing, and I get off on the guys who enjoy watching women smoke and being their ash tray, I don't see him getting into that. He's anti smoking, and would probably pick me up and throw me into a wall if I ever burned him with a cigarette!

I also get off on the cross-dressing thing, he's never going to put on my panties, or allow me to make him up like a drag queen.

I don't understand a lot of my friends who are married, and never have sex with their men (obviously because it's crap sex, and they are just "not that into him", however, they'll never admit it, and don't have a reason why there's no sex going on). Why don't they just start maneuvering their men to their likes & fantasies? Why would they choose to NOT take control? They have no idea what they are missing out on.